Shockingly my 78 year old husband, after 17 years together, has announced he wants us to lead separate lives.  I have decided that I will move out and divorce him because I do not want to spend whatever life I have left in a loveless marriage.

I am profoundly sad.  I also know that I still have the strength to survive as I am only 63 years old.  Between tears I have focused on doing all the practical things required:  finding somewhere else to live, packing up, finding suppliers for the new lifestyle, finding movers to take what furniture I still own.  I will be taking the rescued dog with me as I paid for him and he is registered in my name.  The 7 rescued cats are a bit more difficult!  He wants 2 of them, but I have decided to take them with me because I am the one who does the food and care-taking on a daily basis.

When my husband made his announcement he also said he did not want a divorce because of the money it would cost him.  I do not want more than I am legally entitled to and my lawyer does say we are considered a long-term marriage.  Thus a financial settlement is ahead.  My husband is in for a surprise.

I was a divorce mediator for over 5 years and have gone and photocopied as many of the financial and legal documents that I could find in his desk.  I am including this information here because it will really help to know what his assets are and what the account numbers are etc.  People are expected to make a declaration of assets, yet I have seen people (particularly wealthy men) try to hide what monies are around.  My advice to anyone in a similar position is that old saying ‘possession is 9/10ths of the law’.

I have started re-reading “The WHICH? Guide to Divorce” by Imogen Clout.  It is a very practical guide to the legal and financial arrangements and includes some further information about issues affecting children.  I would recommend not only reading this guide, but if you do have children, please take a look at my e-book “Parenting Your Way Through Divorce”.  You do need to put the needs of the children first.

Grief is shock, sadness, anger, and acceptance and it is not a linear progression.  You go in and out of the various stages.  Luckily as a Psychotherapist for over 20 years I do understand how to grieve well.  If you need more information do take a look at my e-book “Loss is Part of Life”.

I can see a new life opening up and will do my best to embrace whatever is ahead.


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Mini KOBO and Digital Technology

Now you need to understand that I am not technologically minded.  Yes, as an electrically published author, I do know how to use the computer for writing and that’s as far as it goes.  Thus, my adventure into buying an MP4 Player took several hours on www.Amazon.co.uk as I tried to assess the differences between an MP3 Player and the MP4 and then what all the different makers were offering!

I did buy an MP4 player for £14.99 because that seemed a reasonable price to waste if I hated it.  Well, it’s arrived and is lovely to look at and to hold and it promises to give me sterio for music (apparently I can download music to it).  Further, it gives me an FM radio it says, video capability, a camera, and the ability to read e-books on it!  Great if only I could figure out the instructions about how to make it all work.  I need to find a teenager I think!

When I bought my Kindle about 18 months ago it was love at first sight.  I loved it from the moment I held it and felt that it was just as good to read on as to read a paperback book.  Yet, I’ve just been seduced by a Mini Kobo (another e-book reader).  A totally different experience.  It was only £59.99 from W H Smith (bookshop in England) and is tiny by comparison to my Kindle but still readable.  It’s light as a feather to hold and great for the handbag, too.  Just adorable.

My justification for buying a second e-book reader is that I have just had two of my books (Emotional Health for Emotional Wealth and Pre-Marital MOT: A Relationship Inspection) formatted by Matt Horner at ebookpartnerships so that they can be distributed through Gardeners Books Ltd (England) and Ingrams (USA) to the large retail book sellers like Waterstones, Foyles, Tesco, Barnes & Noble etc.  Buy purchasing a copy of my books via my Kobo I will be able to check that the royalty payments system is working well!

Are you sad, angry, stressed or in an unhappy relationship?  Buy for your Kobo or Kindle Emotional Health for Emotional Wealth.  You can also purchase my books via my own website: www.EmotionalHealthForEmotionalWealth.co.uk




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